Let’s face it we all have addictions.
Reiki Practitioners, doctors, nurses. Teachers, lawyers, gardeners.
Mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers.
We all have something, and it is hard to deal with our own let alone the ones of others.
It is so very hard to see a family member (this includes friends) struggle with an addiction, whether it be substance-abuse, smoking, shopping, sex, drinking, eating. We often may feel powerless, especially if we have already spoken our worries to them.
The fact of the matter is that when you truly are addicted to something, you do not see that you are. Your judgement is clouded by the high of the vice. Your propelled forward by your next fix, your next f*ck, your next chocolate cake, your next cup of coffee.
Now before you get on my case about how coffee and methamphetamine are not the same, let me give you a for-instance. Say you are used to drinking 2-3 cups of coffee every morning, and you have done now for weeks, months, or even years now; and then a HUGE curve ball: you have fasting blood-work or are stuck in the hospital. You get cranky, you get jittery, you get mean, you yell, you accost your spouse or friend, you get short with the nurses and physicians. You finally leave in a rush, you speed up to make through the yellow-light, and you get hit by a car, and you either die or are mortally wounded.
Pretty much the same as shooting up until your body goes into shock.
Either way, the same effect happens: you die prematurely. You die mindlessly. You die unconsciously. You leave loved ones behind to mourn your absence. You create wounds that then just cycle in their lives now too.
With Reiki, I have said in a previous post, that as practitioners we have to have the responsibility and humility to recognize things either before they start or to remain aware of our actions. However, addiction happens anyway, and if it is your lesson to learn this lifetime then so be it. You chose this path before you incarnated into this body. Now, what are you to do about it? What are you to do about others in your life who are struggling?
You may have a good idea if you have been a past addict yourself, whether it was illegal substances, alcohol, or otherwise. You’ve been given a great opportunity to help heal others and guide them through. Use your experience! Use your memories, your feelings, your wisdom!
You may have a good idea if you have had a loved one who has suffered with this type of dis-ease before. Again, use your experience, your memories, your feelings, your wisdom!
If you are dealing with this for the first time, then my dear, I humbly say this: this too shall pass. With patience, with diligence, and with love.
Examples of addictions that may warrant an intervention include:
- Prescription drug abuse
- Street drug abuse
- Compulsive eating/ anorexia
- Compulsive gambling
- Video games
- Fox News
People who struggle with addiction are often in denial about their situation and unwilling to seek treatment. They may not recognize the negative effects their behavior has on themselves and others.
An intervention presents your loved one with a structured opportunity to make changes before things get even worse and can motivate someone to seek or accept help.
Examples of “addictions” that may NOT warrant an intervention include:
- Dr. Who
- “Indian Voodoo Chakra Shit.”
I hope that you can be open-minded, open-hearted, and discerning enough to recognize a genuine case of addiction. Cries for help though can sometimes be overlooked. Please again, I cannot stress enough that you consult with a professional therapist or counselor before venturing any further.
I also seriously stress that you consider speaking to your Loved One one by one over a period of time, genuinely expressing your concerns and love. Sometimes this can be enough, and is less jarring as a full-scale-on intervention.
Interventions are above all a last resort.
- Get legal advice before proceeding or you may face civil or even criminal liability for kidnapping or false imprisonment.
- Make sure that there is an actual serious problem, and that the behavior of the friend or family member in question is causing more harm to others than the intervention would cause to them.
- Denial doesn’t always mean a lie: some users might actually be telling the truth when they say their habits are under control. Be honest with yourself about whether they are really causing you harm, or could you be trying to control them.
- Be very careful of the mental state of the person you are performing an intervention on. An intervention should only be performed on someone with a normal state of mind, for both the target individual’s safety, and the safety of the people performing the intervention.
Steps for Planning an Intervention
- Consult with a professional – they know their stuff! Especially if the Loved One has a history of mental illness, is likely to get violent in reaction to the intervention, or has exhibited suicidal behavior.
- Form an Intervention Team – there is strength in numbers! BUT, don’t invite people the Loved One doesn’t like or trust, or who might disrupt the intervention by getting too emotional or coming to the Loved One’s defense.
- Find the Right Treatment Plan – Rehab, getting psychotherapy, or beginning some kind of outpatient treatment program, and good support groups.
- Decide on Team Consequences – Everyone has to mean business! This is BIG. Each Team Member should put forward consequences should the Loved One refuse all treatment plans. This will be HARD. Difficult as it may be, each person must be willing to make a big change in order to help the Loved One make a new start. Because their addictive behavior MUST no longer be enabled by loved ones via money, no more bail outs, hosting, or otherwise. One ultimate consequence could possibly be even divorce/separation for a period of time. Tough Love SUCKS.
- Explain Legal & Life Consequences – Loss of relationships, freedom, STIs, dis-ease, and respect.
- Choose Intervention Time & Place – Private and comfortable! No no-shows either!
- Rehearse Intervention – Stick to the plan! Make sure everyone practices where to sit, what to say,
- Gather All the Facts – Make a list of all that the Loved One is doing that is harmful.
- Creating a List – of actions and behavioral patterns that will no longer be tolerated. Next to each activity, write what your action will be if the Loved One continues these behaviors.
- Anticipate the Loved One’s Reactions – have responses ready.
The Actual Intervention
- Invite the person to the meeting without telling them what it is. – Make sure the plan doesn’t seem contrived. Ask the person to do something that’s not out of the ordinary.
- Prepare the Area – Reiki the room and do a guided meditation for the Team members before the Loved One arrives. Invite all your and your Loved One’s Spirit Guides to come to your aid. Everyone should already be gathered in the space by the time the person gets there. When the person arrives, state that it’s an intervention and tell the person that everyone has something they want to say. Consider defusing a soothing essential oil in the room as well that would be pleasing to the Loved One.
- Have each member speak.– Follow the rehearsal plan! No yelling! If a professional interventionist is involved, he or she can act as the leader of the meeting and call on people to speak.
- Express Emotion – Expressing sadness and hope that things will get better could help move the person to action. It’s OK to cry. Avoid trying to lighten the mood.
- Present the Treatment Plan(s) – Make it clear that the treatment plan has been thoroughly researched and recommended by experts, and say that everyone believes it’s the person’s best bet for getting better. Ask the person to make an immediate decision to accept the plan.
- Loved One’s Reactions – Be ready for the person to express anger, start crying or even laugh. Stress the seriousness of the situation and don’t back down.
- End With Concrete next steps & Begin Treatment Immediately – This might mean physically escorting him or her to a facility where they can start detoxing or undergoing treatment, or it might mean starting therapy or an outpatient program. Have the person make a commitment to going through the entire treatment process and doing whatever it takes to stop the addiction from progressing further.
- Be prepared for the person to refuse treatment. – You can’t force anyone to do anything they don’t want to do. “You can’t heal someone who doesn’t want to be healed.” But this doesn’t mean the intervention was pointless. Now the Loved One knows that their family thinks there’s a serious problem, and by getting these issues out in the open, family can stop the process of enabling the addiction.
- Support the person if he or she chooses treatment. – Help the Loved One feel connected and supported throughout. Everyone involved in the intervention NEEDS to do their part.
- Do not give in if the person asks to end the treatment plan early.
- Don’t Accept Half-measures – The person may argue that just two weeks of rehab was enough to cure the addiction, or that going to counseling three times a week is too much.
- Stick to the Original Treatment Plan – Half-measures don’t work.
- Enforce the consequences. – Tough Love SUCKS, but sometimes has to be done. Allowing the person to just continue living the same way as before the intervention is never going to help. Until the person has full control over his or her addiction, there’s always danger that a crisis will happen. The best thing you can do is cut off funding, break up with the person, or do whatever you personally know will create a significant life change that may help the person take a new path.
- Take Advantage of the Next Crisis – if the person ends up in jail or in the hospital, use that experience to show the person that he or she really does need treatment. Having a second intervention may be helpful.